Being Alone Doesn't Mean Lonely

Sekedar kepengen sharing mengenai perubahan status gue saat ini. Problem dari status single tuh adalah banyaknya orang yang berpikir bahwa gue kesepian, or butuh kasih sayang. And so they try to playing around with me, asking some impolite questions just to see how I react. Mungkin kalo ditanggapi, ya berarti umpan kena, dan berlanjut dengan keisengan lainnya?

Basically sih, gue ngerasa those people really don’t understand that I choose this decision because I knew I won’t be happy If I stay. Jadi semua resiko yang ada, ya gue terima. Bukan berarti gue akan down dan harus mencari pengganti supaya bisa having fun. Salah besar!

There’s a good advice from a community for people with experience same as I do, “Cutting contact with toxic people will transform your life. At first, it feels miserable. Like you’re going cold turkey, from an addiction. But as time goes on, you come to discover that each passing day brings unexpected new blessings. You begin to develop self-respect, boundaries, and true friendships.”

When people make you feel unwanted, don’t leave to make them feel sad or guilty, they won’t. Leave because you no longer have a reason to stay. What is meant to be will end up good and what is not, it won’t. Love is worth fighting for, but sometimes you can’t be the only one fighting.  

Gue sudah memilih ini bukan karena ego gue. Jangan pernah bilang kalau seharusnya gue lebih sabar dan mengalah. Relationship was never about one side, it’s always both sides. Gue sih yakin banget, kalaupun gue mengalah, pasti ujung-ujungnya juga terjadi lagi. Wasting time and energy. Gue sadar, setelah gue mengajukan hal ini, pasti yang terjadi adalah pressure yang terus-terusan dari orang yang sakit jiwa macam dia. Tapi kan ga mungkin juga gue harus bertahan dalam suatu hubungan yang membuat gue terpuruk bukannya makin maju. Ga ada tempat untuk mengembangkan diri karena tidak pernah ada dukungan buat gue. Should I live that way? Relationship should enrich people, not make others feels smaller.    

But I must admit, that I also feel some sort of broken heart feeling lately, to the person that once  filled my emptiness. I MISS THE MOMENT WHEN I CAN SHARE ALL MY FEELING, BUT I KNOW IT'S NOT A GOOD THING TO CHASE SOMEONE THAT WASN'T NEVER MEANT TO BE WITH YOU. Sad but true. I better leave the memories behind and starts the new one.
Wise man said: "To feel complete, you don't need some one else. You just need to love yourself and listen to what your heart says."